When mind and memory flee

More people than ever before are suffering from dementia. The Alzheimer’s Society says there are now 850,000 people in the UK with dementia, including 1 in 6 people over the age of 80. 40% of people with dementia are being cared for in care homes and 60% are being cared for by family members. More than 50% of people with dementia are in the mild stages with 12% being in the severe stage. Caring for a husband or wife, or father or mother with dementia is very demanding and exhausting.

I recently read a moving letter from a Christian lady, Ann, whose husband has dementia. They have been married for more than 40 years and served as missionaries in Asia and London. Ann’s husband studied at Oxford and was an able linguist. She cared for him for 11 years and experienced sadness, isolation and stress. Ann was sad when she saw his mind go blank and him being unable to follow conversations. He was aware of his increasing memory loss and was determined to keep his mind active. Every day he would read to Ann from his library of books and they went for long walks together. But as his condition deteriorated there were fewer visitors, which led to growing isolation for them both.

The increasing demands of care brought Ann to a state of physical and emotional collapse. Then, one evening her husband said to her, “Well it’s been lovely visiting you, but I really must go back to my parents. They will have prepared a meal.” Nothing Ann said could change his mind. For him his “present” was now the past. Wonderfully Ann found a place for her husband in a Christian care home where he is cared for with respect, dignity and love. After visiting her husband Ann is able to leave knowing that he is safe and surrounded by loving carers.

Providing loving support to people with dementia and their family is so important. Just being with them affirms their value as people created in the image of God and our love for them. It’s also a great comfort to have a future hope and to know that there is life beyond dementia in a better world. God does not forget us. A hymn sung in Communion services says, “According to thy gracious word, in meek humility, this will I do, my dying Lord, I will remember thee. And when these failing lips grow dumb and mind and memory flee, when thou shalt in thy kingdom come, Jesus, remember me.”

He has made everything beautiful in its time

The Spring and early summer is a beautiful time as nature comes alive. This year I have been struck by the beautiful colours of the flowers and blossoms as they have come one after another: pure white snowdrops, purple crocuses, yellow daffodils, majestic magnolias, delicate almond blossom, pink cherry trees, bluebells, and, now, the May blossom. The sequence of flowers and colours has been stunning and, unmistakably, reveals the hand of the Creator.

In the book of Ecclesiastes, King Solomon reflected on the meaning of life and wrote, “He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart.” Solomon was famous for his wisdom and his wealth. When the Queen of Sheba visited him, and saw his palace and his court, she said, “The report I heard in my own country about your achievements and your wisdom is true. But I did not believe these things until I came and saw with my own eyes. Indeed, not even half was told me; in wisdom and wealth you have far exceeded the report I heard.” Yet, when Solomon surveyed God’s creation he saw a beauty far beyond anything the human mind could create and it moved him to worship the awesome God of who created this beauty.

Solomon also saw that the beauty of creation is transient; everything is beautiful “in its time.” The flowers fade and fall; their beauty is only for a brief time. It is the same in our experience of life. Human beings are the pinnacle of God’s creation. We bear the image of God and have the glorious capacity to know and love him. Yet, the various stages of our lives quickly pass: the beautiful baby, the boundless energy of childhood, the exciting potential of adolescence, the strength of early adult years, the immense possibilities of middle age, the beauty and dignity of retirement years, before our faculties decline. The inexorable movement of time defies our deep longing to find that which is lasting and totally fulfilling.

The transient nature of life’s beauty points us to the eternity that God has put in our hearts. We echo the words of the hymn, “Swift to its close ebbs out life’s little day; earth’s joys grow dim; its glories pass away; change and decay in all around I see; O Thou who changest not, abide with me.” There really is an eternal world, which is even more beautiful than this world. God is there, and the beauty of that world never fades.

Secure in the love of God

The terrorist atrocities in Paris have left 129 people dead and more than 350 injured, some critically. The 7 suicide bombers all died after they had attacked restaurants, cafes, bars, a rock concert and the Stade de France. The 3 groups of terrorists used bombs and Kalashnikov assault rifles in a way not seen before on the streets of Western Europe. The attacks have left the French people traumatised and other nations fearing that similar attacks may also come to their streets. Our hearts go out to those who have so tragically lost loved ones.

It is not possible to make sense of the events of this life without reference to God and eternity. Some people believe that this life is the only life there is, but this leaves big questions unanswered. The Bible tells us that we are created in the image of God and have both a body and a soul, that can never die. We also have a conscience by which we know the difference between right and wrong. So we know that doing what is right matters and that we are all accountable to God for the things we do.

The sacredness of every human life and the evil of wilfully killing human beings is something we all affirm because of who we are. We are created in God’s image. Tragically it seems that some people are being deceived into believing that committing terrorist acts and killing yourself with a bomb takes you to a reward in paradise. But we know that cannot be true. Sinful actions cannot be rewarded and no-one can escape the eternal consequences of their actions by taking their own life.

The events in Paris also remind us of the fragility of our lives. People who set out on Friday evening to relax with friends over a meal died in a way they could not possibly have anticipated. We all need to find refuge in God and to know that, whatever happens, there is nothing that can separate us from his love in Jesus. The apostle Paul wrote a letter to persecuted Christians living in Rome, some of whom would die for their faith in Jesus. He told them, “For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

Dying with Dignity

An unofficial Commission has recently reported on the subject of assisted dying/suicide. The Commission was chaired by Lord Falconer, a former Justice Secretary, and was funded by Sir Terry Pratchett, the well known author, who has Alzheimer’s disease. The Commission was set up because those involved felt the present law, which makes assisted dying illegal, is “inadequate.” Most of the members of the Commission were known to be in favour of legalising assisted dying/suicide.

The recommendations of the Commission were that, in certain circumstances, assisted dying should be legalised. If a person is over 18, has a terminal illness, and is not expected to live more than 12 months, they should be permitted to kill themselves, provided they are not mentally impaired and are able to make a voluntary decision. The person would also need to be independently assessed by two doctors before being given the medicine to end their lives. The Commission believed there was a “strong case” for this procedure to be legalised. Many people refused to give evidence to the Commission, including the BMA, who said the majority of doctors do not want to legalise assisted dying.

This is a very important subject for any civilised society. Since the 1967 Abortion Act was passed there have been 7 million abortions in the UK. Mothers expecting babies whom tests reveal have a disability are routinely encouraged to abort them so that the child will not become a drain on resources. Now it is being proposed, in the guise of being caring and allowing freedom of choice, that the terminally ill be helped to “die with dignity.” This is a serious issue for us all.

It is very important that we affirm the sanctity of every human life. We all bear the image of God and have an eternal soul. The way we care for the terminally ill and elderly affirms the value we set on every individual person. I have often witnessed the loving care of families and medical staff for those who are dying. When life is drawing to an end it means so much to be surrounded by our loved ones. The excellent care now available in hospitals and hospices eases the final days for many. Long may this loving care continue. How tragic it would be if the law allowed people to ask their doctors to give them a fatal dose of drugs so that they can commit suicide.