The challenge of digital dependency

For the first time in many years sales of dumb phones have increased. Dumb phones only enable people to make phone calls and send texts. Some people want to escape round the clock access to social media. One lady said, “I just hated the fact I was always on it. My friend told me I checked my smartphone 150 times a day and told me I was always on Facebook pages and Instagram. The more you do it the more you feel you need to do it. Switching to a dumb phone is not full cold turkey because I do have an iPad, but it’s more about choice. If I go out with just a dumb phone then I can make a choice and have a day without all the noise of the notifications and apps.”

A recent report by Ofcom entitled “A Decade of Digital Dependency” says that 78% of people in Britain now have a smartphone and most of them say they couldn’t live without it. People spend less time making phone calls and more time messaging and accessing the internet. Many check their phones every 12 minutes and spend more than a day a week online. 40% of adults check their phone within 5 minutes of waking up and just before they switch out the light at night. On average young people aged 15-24 spend 4 hours a day on their phones and check them every 8 minutes. For the first time women are spending more time online than men.

While the Ofcom report highlights benefits such as keeping in touch with family, it also says that smartphone use increases stress and disrupts personal and family life. More than 50% of people admitted that using their smartphone interrupts conversations with friends and family. Using a smartphone at mealtimes was deemed inappropriate by 72% of 18-34s and 90% of those aged over 55.

Smartphones must be used wisely. Time is valuable, and our lives fly by so quickly. Personal face-to-face relationships are really important. Our family and real friends are very precious. Real friends do not demand our constant attention but love and give. There are many things we don’t need to know but some things are so important we dare not miss them. Time to listen to God and to speak to him is vital. He hears our prayers and he cares. When we begin and end each day speaking to him in prayer he gives us his peace and the strength to face whatever may come.

A love that forgives and forgets

Last week someone broke into a small valley church in Abersychan in South Wales. They stole £60 in cash that had been collected by the Mother and Toddlers’ group to provide toys, books, biscuits, drinks and snacks for the children. There were also plans to hold a Christmas party. When people in the community heard what had happened there was a wonderful response. A local councillor set up a crowdfund page inviting people to raise £200 to replace the money that had been stolen and to repair the damage to the church building. He wrote, “Ove the past few years, Noddfa, under the direction of Pastor John, has worked hard within the community to help the youth and residents. Please help to replace their loss to show what a caring community we are.” So far nearly £800 has been donated!

On his Facebook, Pastor John thanked the people for their generous support of the church. He said, “As a church we love everyone in our valley just as Christ loved us. We long for opportunities to show this love by sacrificially giving and supporting the community we have been called by God to serve.” He expressed grief that someone was so desperate at Christmas time to risk so much for such a small amount adding, “If they had simply come to see us, we would have rallied around them and supported as best we could. If they are reading this, we have a number of events going on over Christmas and they are most welcome to come and join us to find out more about a love that they will not receive anywhere else, a love that can forgive and forget.”

This story wonderfully illustrates the great themes of the Christmas message. Christmas is about forgiveness. Whether we attend a church or not, we all break God’s commands and need to experience God’s forgiveness. Before Jesus was born Joseph was told that Mary would give birth to a son and that he was to give him the name Jesus because “he will save his people from their sins.” Each of us needs a Saviour and through Jesus all our sins can be forgiven.

Christmas is also about giving. At Christmas we remember the amazing gift God gave to the people of the world – his beloved Son. In John’s Gospel we read, “For God loved the world so much that he gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.”

The God of second chances

On 11 June Vincent Uzomah, a supply science teacher at a school in Bradford, was stabbed with a kitchen knife by a 14 year old pupil. Vincent was very seriously injured and was afraid he was going to die. The boy had racially abused Vincent and had told his school friends he was going to kill him. After the attack the boy put a post on Facebook saying what he had done and 69 people said they “liked” his post. The boy has been given an 11-year sentence and Vincent may never return to a classroom.

After the trial Vincent said, “As a Christian I have forgiven this boy who has inflicted this trauma and pain on me and my family. Our prayer for him is that he will make use of the opportunities and support that will be provided to him to become a changed person who will make a positive contribution to society.” People like Vincent shine light into our dark world.

Why could Vincent speak of forgiving a young man who so obviously hates him? Hatred and revenge are the normal human responses to those who mistreat us; forgiveness is rare. Vincent is able to forgive the boy because he himself has experienced God’s forgiveness. He became a Christian when he realised his own sinfulness before a holy God and acknowledged that God could justly condemn him for all the sins he has committed. He confessed his sin to God and asked for forgiveness. He also put his trust in Jesus Christ, God’s Son, who died on the cross to pay the price of his sins. Vincent experienced the amazing love of God and found forgiveness and new life in Jesus. Every day Vincent continues to need forgiveness and prays, “Forgive us our trespasses and we forgive those who trespass against us.”

Vincent’s experience of God’s love and grace in Jesus has also taught him that God is a God of second chances and new beginnings. No matter what we have done, God is able to change us from the inside and give us a new heart. That is why Vincent and his wife are praying for the boy during his time in custody. He, too, can experience God’s forgiveness and find new life in Jesus. This offers real hope to us all in our daily struggle with our sinful hearts and ways. God’s promise in Jesus is, “I will forgive their wickedness and I will never again remember their sins.”

Real relationships in an impersonal world

The amount of time spent in face to face contact with family and friends has dramatically reduced because of the increased use of mobile phones and social media. Psychologist Dr Aric Sigman has said, “As the amount of time spent looking at a screen or plugging in increases, the amount of direct eye-to-eye contact and developing real-life relationships inevitably decreases. By the age of 7 years, the average child born today will have spent one full year of 24 hour days watching screen technology. By the time they reach 80 they will have spent almost 18 years of 24 hour days watching non-work related screen technology. That’s a quarter of their lives.”

The implications of this are very serious for developing meaningful real-life relationships. Although on the face of it mobile phones and social media are means of keeping in touch with people, they are seriously distorting human relationships. People may have many “friends” on Facebook, but they seldom meet them and spend time with them. Instead they exchange information. Given the option of making a phone call or sending a text most people today choose to send a text. Famous people send brief messages to their “followers” on Twitter.

Real relationships are very important for us all. We are essentially relational beings. When God first created Adam he said, “It is not good for man to be alone.” Eve was a God’s special creation as an equal to Adam, so that they could share their lives together. Human relationships between husbands and wives, parents and children, brothers and sisters can be the source of the deepest joy and happiness. The experience of mutual love is a wonderful blessing. When close relationships go wrong we inevitably experience intense pain and sadness.

The iPad and the mobile phone can be turned off. Only slaves are on call 24/7! How important it for us to make it a priority to spend quality time with our family and friends. We can also spend quality time with God. Through his Son, Jesus Christ, any of us can experience the privilege of becoming one of God’s children. Through prayer we can speak to him at any time, wherever we are. He is never too busy to hear our prayers. We can also listen to him. Through his Word, the Bible, he speaks to us and makes many wonderful promises. Through a personal relationship with God in Jesus we can experience his love and discover the purpose for which we were created.