Being loved and accepted

A Cardiff University study has revealed an increase in the number of children and young people who are self-harming. Tragically some young people have even taken their own lives. The increase in self-harm is greatest among young girls. Some social media sites show examples of self-harming which encourage other young self-harmers to injure themselves even more seriously. One teenage girl told researchers that looking at the websites left her feeling that one small cut was “not nearly good enough.”

The desire to self-harm arises from a feeling of sadness and rejection. Many years ago, before social media, we knew a young girl who would sometimes injure herself causing her great pain. We couldn’t understand why she was doing it. A consultant psychiatrist told us that she was doing it to punish herself when people didn’t like her. Other girls in school were being very unkind to her, and were excluding her, so she didn’t like herself. She felt it was her fault that she was being treated in this way and so she inflicted pain on herself.

We all have a deep need to be loved and accepted but, in our increasingly aggressive society, we may experience rejection and even active hostility. In his ministry Jesus revealed a tender love and warm acceptance of those who had been rejected by the society of his day. He was accused of being a “friend of tax collectors and sinners.” In response he said, “Healthy people don’t need a doctor – sick people do. I have not come to call those who think they are righteous, but those who know they are sinners.”

One day Jesus was invited to the house of a Pharisee called Simon. While he was there an immoral woman came into the house and knelt at Jesus’ feet weeping. As her tears fell on his feet, she wiped them with her hair and anointed his feet with expensive perfume. Simon was appalled that Jesus would allow such a woman to touch him. Jesus said to him, “Look at this woman kneeling here. I came into your house. You did not give me any water for my feet, but she wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. You did not give me a kiss, but this woman, from the time I entered, has not stopped kissing my feet. You did not put oil on my head, but she has poured perfume on my feet. Therefore, I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven – as her great love has shown.”

Christian love in dangerous places

The Ebola outbreak in West Africa is very serious and is causing real concern in other parts of the world. Ebola kills up to 90% of those infected. Most of those who survive receive early treatment. Already more than 700 people have died in Guinea, Liberia and Sierra Leone and there have also been a few cases in other countries. Margaret Chan, the head of the World Health Organisation, has warned that the Ebola outbreak is spreading faster than efforts to control it.

A state of emergency has been declared in Sierra Leone. About 30 athletes from Sierra Leone who have been competing at the Commonwealth Games in Glasgow have expressed concern about returning to their home country and have requested a visa extension. A number of relief agencies have evacuated their volunteer workers from Liberia as a precaution. A doctor working in Liberia with the Christian relief agency, Samaritan’s Purse, has contracted Ebola and has returned to the United States for treatment. He is one of the first people ever to be treated for Ebola in the States.

I have a friend who works in a Christian hospital near Kampala in Uganda. A few years ago there was an Ebola outbreak in Uganda which affected the area near the hospital. I asked her what she would do if the latest Ebola outbreak spread to Uganda and what the mission agency with which she works would advise her to do. She is a young, single person and she said that she felt it would be right for her to remain at the hospital and to try to help those who had the disease and those in danger of being infected. She said she would feel very uncomfortable if she thought only of her own safety and evacuated the country. She realises that families with children may, for good reasons, make a different decision.

Her selfless love and commitment to the people she cares for was very challenging in a world where many of us think only of ourselves. Jesus, the Son of God, came into the world to set us free from sin and death. He could only do this by putting himself in great danger and dying in our place. He said, “The Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and give his life as a ransom for many.” One hymn says, “Jesus sought me when a stranger, wandering from the fold of God. He, to rescue me from danger interposed his precious blood.“